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The Parent’s Impact on the Child


Norma asks:

Dear Veronica,
How can a parent’s chart positively impact their child’s?

I love this question. I believe this is one of the greatest way to use Chinese Astrology because knowing how to nurture your children creates harmony.


Every Natal Chart has 4 pillars that are derived from the Year, Month, Day & Hour of birth.

To a parent, the Children’s Pillar is the Hour pillar. The relationship between the Hour pillar and the Day Pillar of the parent’s natal chart can describe the nature of their relationship and parental expectations.


Childhood is a very important time. Parents are the child’s first teachers and mentors. The home where the children grow up is the environment where every experience has a potential to shape their life.


A More Direct Approach


My approach using Chinese Astrology is to see the child’s chart and help them develop their strengths, minimizing excessive elements. A Natal chart can also indicate the child’s best directions for bed placement. It helps the child grow up healthier mentally, physically and emotionally.


A child’s chart also indicates the nature of the relationship with the parent. In a home with multiple children, this is the best way to see how the parental relationship impacts a particular child. Whether the relationship is smooth or not, it is indicated in the chart. We are born to have certain life experiences.


The 5 Elements


The easiest way anyone can use a chart is by using the 5 Love Elements. It is very similar to using the 5 love languages without the therapy or guesswork.


  1. Get your child's Natal Chart

  2. Look for your child’s Day Element in the STEM column. It should be one of these: Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal or Water. It does not matter if the element is Yin or Yang.

  3. Use their element to know how to communicate with them. The Day Element represents the self, it is what the child resonates with. As a parent, using this information can help establish rapport with the child. Granted this is easier when the child is small… establishing rapport with a teen can take longer.

The Meaning of the 5 Elements

  1. The Wood Child would enjoy quality time with the parent. Perhaps learning something, doing a puzzle or just being by them.

  2. A Fire Child will enjoy closer interaction and physical touch. Let them know you love them by showing them affection and happiness.

  3. An Earth Child feels loved when you do things for them. They need to trust. This does not mean spoiling them but showing them that you are there when they need you

  4. A Metal Child needs stability from the parent. A super busy schedule will not work particularly well for a metal child, as they need down time.

  5. The Water Child needs guidance, wisdom, gentle words, boundaries and clear communication.


Using this easy guide will help you understand your child better, establish a good rapport and enjoy a harmonious relationship.


Thank you so much for posting your question.

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